Still facing ongoing difficulties with understanding women? Or understanding what women want in men? I’ve got you covered.
If you believe all the movies out there (and you should, because life always sounds better with a Howard Shore soundtrack and that hissing sound you just heard is an Alien waiting to pounce on you), you could be led to believe that womankind, them of XX chromosomes, are beyond complex, inherently contradictory organisms.
They say yes when they mean no; they say no when they mean no; they like the attention, but protest when you pay too much attention claiming its ‘patronising’; they dislike being objectified, yet dress up like a cliché.
What’s a man to do? Are women beyond understanding? Is gritting your teeth to watch Sex and the City and endless chick flicks the only way to gain a modicum of understanding of the female psyche?
Bullshit.
Okay, in slightly less harsh tones, just bull. Women aren’t as complex as the media makes them out to be, seriously.
You see, the myth of complicated women sells; it’s the stuff of movie plotlines, tv serials and corny helpbooks emblazoned with the words: “How to understand women in five easy steps!”.
Understanding women is easy; just put yourself in their shoes. If you don’t like being treated or talked to in a certain ways, odds are a girl won’t either. You like to be flattered; they like to be flattered. You get ticked if a guy flirts with your girlfriend, she’ll be irritated if you get friendly with other girls.
The main difference between a guy and a girl isn’t so much the way we think, but our reactions. Men are programmed to be more blasé, girls, understandably, are more emotional.
So understanding women is more about managing expectations than solving a murder mystery. Women aren’t complex; they just have more exaggerated responses.
What you may brush off with an irritated sigh can turn into a full tantrum for a girl. Realizing this is half the battle won; the other half is won by attention, honesty and apologies (where necessary).
Except if it’s that time of the month. That’s when all rationality flies out the window, and you’re better off finding some cover holding up until it blows over.
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To your dating success,
Andrew Wang (Allurre)
